Twain creates a diversion by insulting the aliens in such a way that they thank him for it while Edison builds an escape pod from plans stolen from Nikola Tesla.

You guys should read The Five Fists of Science, which is more or less what you just described (but with Tesla and Twain teaming up against the mad plans of Edison.)

Yeah, I was about to say: Twain was buddies with Tesla (as well as Sigmund Freud, incidentally), so I don't think he and Edison would have hit it off.

For those of you who haven't seen it, here's a pic of the two guys fooling around in Tesla's lab: http://www.teslasociety.com/pictures/twainpic.jpg

After posing for the shot, they drank Old Fashioneds and shot squirrels with a pellet gun in the back yard.

Twain was the original gadget nut. If he was alive today he'd be having a running competition with Stephen Fry as to see who could have the most podcasts. The man could pilot a steamboat, his brother was a civil engineer, the guy was OBSESSED with gadgetry and one of the world's great alpha nerds.

They should include George Washington Carver. "If only I had some peanuts! I'd get us out of here in a jiffy!" You can thank The Tick for that joke.

Apropos of nothing, Elvis was a big gadget nut too. They have his mobile phone on display at Graceland - the thing is the size of a fucking suitcase. I guarantee you he would have been all over laptops and PDAs and shit were he alive today. Dude used to race go-karts with his friends up and down Elvis Presley Boulevard.

I read that Twain tried a vibrating platform made by Tesla, and it gave him the runs.

Shortly thereafter he would be involved in saving the world with Whoopi Goldberg.

And a certain space captain.