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Desc:Grown man showcases his psychologically unsound teddy ruxpin doll
Category:Humor, Horror
Tags:nightmare fuel, teddy ruxpin, real-life nightmares
Submitted:Moustache McGillicuddy
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Comment count is 26
Wonko the Sane - 2009-03-08
SolRo - 2009-03-08
showcases his psychologically unsound SELF
Billie_Joe_Buttfuck - 2009-03-09


Frank Rizzo - 2009-03-08
this guy disturbs me
Severian - 2009-03-08
Check out some of his other videos. He is disturbed and disturbing.

Caminante Nocturno - 2009-03-08
The man himself is malfunctioning more than the doll.
Moustache McGillicuddy - 2009-03-08
During these troubled times, I'm sure most people feel like this doll does on the inside.

*after you read this part you will hate me:*
No matter how many pertinent global crises we have to deal with these days, it would be so damn great if each individual person took responsibility for their lives and corrected their low self-esteem and severe insecurity issues instead of suppressing them. We keep trying to fix things as a group, and, well, it's not really working, because we all have problems as individuals. Maybe we need to stop thinking in groups at this time and start acknowledging and dealing with all of our dysfunctions. Then, when we've corrected our inner-issues we can start working as a group and really better humanity.
Charles - 2009-03-09
I hated you before the disclaimer. Now I want to kill you.

Toenails - 2009-03-09
I don't hate you, but I will fault you for not including a much better tag: "nightmare fuel".

I always wondered what algorithm Ruxpin uses for blinking. Seeing him all glitched out is like a little window on it, but it's still a mystery.

I also have this cassette tape called "Mind Control in America", which is pretty terrifying to listen to. It talks about such things as the subliminal messages they put in the Exorcist (sounds of angry bees, sounds pigs being slaughtered, death mask of some bishop a.k.a. "Scary face man" etc. etc.), subliminal messages people had broadcast on the radio ("How about a cup of coffee" and "There's somebody at the door"), and Hitler's use of subliminal messages to sway the German populous.

Needless to say, it would make a excellent cassette to pop into Ruxpin and play.

futurebot - 2009-03-10
I have no idea what you're even trying to say, what do self-esteem problems have to do with the fall of global capitalism

cognitivedissonance - 2009-03-08
Low self-esteem, noodly no-muscle weirdo with a decent growth of stubble... he's exactly every single thing I look for in a man AND MORE.
Deplorable - 2009-03-09
This, I want to give him a hug.

Slumgullion - 2009-03-09
Christ on a crutch. That guy's a real bring-down.
baleen - 2009-03-09
He seems sort of normal to me. He bought a mutant teddy ruxpin doll and made a video without really thinking about it. He should have just gone "hey I got this fucked up doll look" and it would have been 20 seconds. he tried to make it interesting and failed. he's also camera shy, which I'm sure about 80% of you folks are.
Toenails - 2009-03-09
Just because we don't wear face-paint and call ourselves Cena_Mark doesn't make you any better than us!

futurebot - 2009-03-10
actually it does

Jeff Fries - 2009-03-09
When they came out with ET Book-on-Tape my friend brought his Teddy Ruxpin to school so we could all listen to it, but Teddy was so creepy that it warped our perception of the story; we convinced ourselves that there was also an evil ET who wanted to kill his good twin and do horrible things to children, so horrible to behold that his only representation in the picture book was his vanguard of astronaut men.
fluffy - 2009-03-09
Kind of like Father Of The Bride 2.
Prickly Pete - 2009-03-09
I don't get it. Just judging from this video he doesn't seem THAT messed up. I mean, not in a world where people are getting fucked to death by horses anyway.

Also, I don't quite remember; did Teddy Ruxpin lip synch to ANY casette tape, or did it have to be predetermined ones? If it's any tape, I'm sure there's a whole world of videos that realize the potential there...
swickape - 2009-03-09
Teddy Ruxpins can't lip-sync to any old tape. The tapes are special in two ways. First of all, they have a rectangular slot cut in them where regular tapes do not. When you press play on a Teddy Ruxpin, a trigger comes down and fits into the slot in the special tape. If you put in a normal tape without the slot then the trigger mechanism doesn't fit into the groove and it prevents Teddy from speaking. (You can get around this by carefully removing the trigger.) The second difference is that the left stereo track on a Teddy Ruxpin tape is a regular audio signal and the right track is an analog signal that gives instructions on how to move the mouth and eyes. If this signal is missing, Teddy won't move his mouth and eyes (or at least will move them very sporadically). You can hear this if you pop a Teddy tape into a regular stereo.

There's a good chance this guy's Teddy Ruxpin is fine but the tape is warped. This would explain why the audio coming from the speakers sounds distorted. If the analog signal on the other track was warped as well, it would cause Teddy's epilepsy.

Bort - 2009-03-09
Even under the best of circumstances, Teddy Ruxpin looks like a plush Angela Lansbury.
Rodents of Unusual Size - 2009-03-09
That was unexpectedly depressing.
Hooper_X - 2009-03-09
Okay, that guy is the creepiest fucking ventriloquist ever.

"Uh... hey, Billy. Do you want to tell the kids a joke?"
"Man, I don't know about that, Billy. The kids might take that the... uh... wrong way."

It feels vaguely like an old Joel Hodgson stand-up routine. But not funny.
Big Beef Burritos Supreme - 2009-03-09
"I don't know why I still want stuff my parents didn't buy me."

To recapture the happy times. For the nostalgia. And what Possessed Ruxpin says is that you can never go back. Also, that batteries are still as essential and expensive as ever.

I loved the way the camera close in to heighten the intensity as he talked. Bravo, strange art people. Bravo.
chumbucket - 2009-03-09
"now I ASK you, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, HOW can we put away this MAN for killing these PEOPLE when he was brought up in a household that gave him one of THESE toys as a child?? Therefore you MUST acquit..by reason of bad childhood toys!"
thebaronsdoctor - 2009-03-14
Y'all bring any matches for Mikey?
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