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Desc:Yahtzee takes on Nintendo's latest wiimote wagglefest
Category:Video Games, Cartoons & Animation
Tags:Nintendo, Wii, Wii Sports, zero punctuation, Yahtzee
Submitted:RockBolt
Date:07/29/09
Views:1923
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Comment count is 31
THA SUGAH RAIN - 2009-07-29
Thank you for helping me feel better about never buying a wii, even when the girls were swinging their hips on it.
Hooker - 2009-07-29
Man, that was a great video.

Tuan Jim - 2009-07-29
5 for Girls!

spikestoyiu - 2009-07-30
Yeah, it's otherwise very difficult to find sexy videos of girls on the Internet.

Caminante Nocturno - 2009-07-29
Yahtzee won't give bowling the time of day.
Cleaner82 - 2009-07-30
If Yahtzee saw bowling on fire, he would not piss on bowling to put it out.

So great is his disdain for bowling.

UnderANeonHalo - 2009-07-29
I'll give the Wii props for making a fairly fun bowling game. Am I buying one? No. I already own a bowling ball and the idea of sports without any actual exertion on my behalf is, well, sickening.

Now I'm going to go and play a cycling game with my recumbent bike, hope I don't accidentally burn a calorie!
phalsebob - 2009-07-30
Bowling requires exertion.



?

Ranma X. - 2009-07-30
Hey man, those pitchers of Coors Light ain't gonna carry themselves.... unless there's a waitress at the bar to do it for you while you throw your 10th straight 8 point frame.

spikestoyiu - 2009-07-30
A 0 system to poorly replicate something that you can do very easily and fairly cheaply "IRL?" Nah.

Big Beef Burritos Supreme - 2009-07-30
It's a great party game, if you're either twelve or have terrible parties.

Riskbreaker - 2009-07-29
It's funny because it's true.
Billie_Joe_Buttfuck - 2009-07-29
"Je suis la twat"
Pillager - 2009-07-30
He's still got it.

FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30
Has he ever actually articulated his hatred for the Wii in some way that makes sense?

All I gather is that there are these people called "casual gamers" and nobody should be making games for them because...?
Ranma X. - 2009-07-30
His argument is two-fold.

One is that he feels motion controls in general, an on the Wii in particular, suffer from lacking any sort of tactile feedback. While you can see or hear what happens, any immersion gained from the controls is lost without such feedback.

Two, the Wii's tendency to cater to shallow gameplay mechanics such as the Wii Sports is bad because it's a shortcut to making money which ultimately damages the medium in the long run since "real" (whatever that means) innovation is stymied in lieu of easy money.

I sort of buy argument one, argument two is kind of a wash, as there are some (not nearly enough) Wii games like No More Heroes to keep me interested. Besides, the real heart of the Wii in my opinion is the VC/Wii-ware.

I look forward to new innovations in "embarrassment-challenging" games.

Tuan Jim - 2009-07-30
He articulated it just as Ranma said in the vid, which you don't seem to have watched.

Xenocide - 2009-07-30
No matter who you ask, "Real" innovation always means "more of the type of games that I personally like."

The whole "casual gamers are ruining gaming" argument is ridiculous for three reasons:

1) It's far, far older than the Wii. In fact it tends to pop up every other generation or so. The aging crop of gamers take a "YOU DAMN KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN" attitude toward the newer bunch, and their console of choice gets labeled "casual" and decried as the ruination of the industry. The die-hard Atari fans made the same argument toward the NES, the die-hard Nintendo fans made the same argument toward the PS1, and now here we are.

2) It hinges on the idea that the Wii's abundance of terrible shovelware is diverting resources from quality game design, as if shovelware came from great developers who were being creatively compromised and not the absolute dregs of the industry. For this argument to work, you have to believe that if the companies behind Cereal Mascot Racing and Family Minigame Jamboree 5 were developing for a console without waggle, they'd have each cranked out the next Portal by now.

3) The idea that playing a game casually is bad betrays a fundamental failure to understand what the word "game" means.

Hooker - 2009-07-30
The Wii strikes me as the Perfect Strangers of video games. Lots of people eat it up, but it's still an endless supply of garbage.

FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30
"For this argument to work, you have to believe that if the companies behind Cereal Mascot Racing and Family Minigame Jamboree 5 were developing for a console without waggle, they'd have each cranked out the next Portal by now"

Exactly. If you come out and say "Okay, no more shallow, family-friendly bowling games" (or whatever), the money currently being made off those doesn't magically get diverted to Final Fantasy XXXXVII or whatever because "games is games." Instead of whatever types of games Yahtzee likes getting a bigger piece of the industry pie, they just end up with the same size slice of an overall smaller pie. Nobody wins anything in that case.

Toenails - 2009-07-30
May I just say that I like this discussion because it addresses two Wii games that I cannot wait to play:

Cereal Mascot Racing
Perfect Strangers

Holy fuck I can't wait to play Balki.

Sputum - 2009-07-30
The problems with the Wii are a little difficult to put your finger. All I know is thus (since we are doing the numbered list thing):

1. I like video games
2. I own a wii, and no other current consoles
3. I don't enjoy any of the games for wii. (Well maybe I like one of them.)
4. Just about any Wii game might as well be a flash game.

It seems like developers had a really hard time working around the shitty hardware of the console, so all of their efforts went into making controls that didn't entirely suck. Usually in vein.

Also Nintendo seems to only give out licenses to games that won't offend anyone.

FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30
"One is that he feels motion controls in general, an on the Wii in particular, suffer from lacking any sort of tactile feedback. While you can see or hear what happens, any immersion gained from the controls is lost without such feedback."

How is that different from a gamepad/keyboard/mouse? And is "tactile feedback facilitating greater immersion" even a goal of the Wii controls in the first place, or is the point more to get players moving something other than their thumbs for once? The Wii doesn't make ice cream, either.

"Two, the Wii's tendency to cater to shallow gameplay mechanics such as the Wii Sports is bad because it's a shortcut to making money"

So Risk is just a shortcut to making money because it isn't Axis and Allies and it's damaging the boardgame "medium?" This is moon man logic.
SteamPoweredKleenex - 2009-07-30
If "motion" is your goal, to make the gamer feel like they're hitting a ball or swinging a sword, having no "thwack" kind of leaves the experience half-full. At least with a button, when you want your character to punch something, he punches when you hit "A."

Not so the Wiimote. It's a highly inaccurate beast when you aren't using the buttons, and it's difficult to know if you're waggling it properly or improperly to get the game to acknowledge your input.

As for the "shortcut to making money," keep in mind that us Wii owners already own half of the games this package has as they CAME WITH THE CONSOLE. "Risk" is different from "Axis and Allies," and I'll pay a shitload less for a "Risk" game (unless it's a special version) for good reason. I'd also defy you to find a Wii game that (1) had as much thought or playtesting put into it as "Risk" and (2) didn't use the Wiimote motion-gimmick to make it more difficult to accomplish something that could just have easily been covered by pushing the "A" button.

FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30
"As for the "shortcut to making money," keep in mind that us Wii owners already own half of the games this package has as they CAME WITH THE CONSOLE."

Rehashing an older game? WELL I NEVER

Riskbreaker - 2009-07-30
I'm a purist/old cranky man regarding this whole motion controls thing. Not that i detest the idea of motion controls per se, but if it's not going to work well with the game, or not work well at all, then please don't bother. Just give me something to play with a regular control. Most companies see this as a big gimmick, and they don't bother to make the damn thing work properly.
SkeletonMichelle - 2009-07-30
This was the funniest Yahtzee in a long time.

I disagree with his perspective on the Wii, though. There are some legitimately great games for it--not nearly enough, I agree, but some--such as No More Heroes and, in particular, Super Mario Galaxy, which do use the motion controls in minor but very enjoyable ways, so I wish that he and others didn't dismiss the Wii out of hand because of games like Wii Sports. I also wish that more games used the Wii's unique controls well--for me, Metroid Prime 3 was considerably better than its Gamecube predecessors, because I thought that Samus finally felt like Samus and not like Robocop, thanks in part to the control scheme--but the existence of games like Wii Sports and other wagglefests isn't the problem.
SteamPoweredKleenex - 2009-07-30
"No More Heroes" was one of the better games, but it also highlighted some of the Wii's weak points:

1. Waggling the Wiimote for combos was a crap-shoot at best. It was very hard to tell when I was doing it properly and when the Wii decided I wasn't using enough wrist-action or whatever it was looking for.
2. The hardware limitations were really evident. All non-boss enemies were the same set of polygons and that "dark shadow" effect to hide the lack of processing power started to be quite tiresome.
3. I don't know if the Wii's setup is to blame per se, but how many random bonus attack-powerups have you received when you downed the last enemy and the game won't let you progress to the next section until it's finally worn off?

Sputum - 2009-07-30
I didn't like no more heros. I really wanted to because I loved Killer 7.

It tried to do a whole bunch of different things (mostly things that other games had already done), but ended up doing them poorly.
- The Waggle controls pissed me off
- The working minigames got really annoying
- I have no idea why collecting all of the clothes is supposed to be fun, but it's not
- The drive-around-the-city thing was really poorly put together and altogether unnecessary
- Honestly, I feel like it was stylistically ugly and stupid

The one truely good game for the Wii is Smash Brothers Brawl, and that is definitely a "if you like that sort of thing" game.

Big Beef Burritos Supreme - 2009-07-30
WII BOWLING!
oh fuck off
Cleaner82 - 2009-07-30
I winced when I saw the title. I knew it was going to be painful, and was it ever.
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