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Desc:This movie is going to suck and make a million billion dollars anyways
Category:Classic Movies, Trailers
Tags:CGI, trainwreck, james cameron, avatar, goddammit Canada
Submitted:Anonymous
Date:11/28/09
Views:4473
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Comment count is 52
Maggot Brain
Stevie Wonder; still can't see shit.
Ursa_minor
Night elves VS space marines! Gandalfs Vs Super Veritechs! Ghengis Khans VS Hydroelectric power! 50 Dan Marinos VS The Redwoods!
Riskbreaker
The space marines from Aliens meet a bunch of blue Ja Jar Binks: The movie

baleen

I am going to start MY drinking when the first Sage Character is introduced. Thanks Joseph Campbell!

IrishWhiskey
Riskbreakers description sounds awesome... until you learn which side is supposed to be the heroes

socialist_hentai
imagine the fan-fiction/fan-art porn this thing is gonna generate.
sosage
I thought this was paying homage to Internet fan fiction furry porn this whole time. You mean it isn't?

dead_cat
I'm from the future. I don't have to imagine it.

pastorofmuppets
You got Fern Gully in my Halo!
pastorofmuppets
Eh, you guys are too young for that movie. We had other interesting things when I was young, like Bell Biv DeVoe, and Perfect Strangers.

oogaBooga
TOO YOUNG FOR FERN GULLY?!

baleen

I remember Fern Gully. I had sex in the house of one of the 2D animators of Fern Gully on New Year's Eve 2000. True story.

TeenerTot
baleen, every post you write makes me more intrigued. Or maybe afraid. Either way, it's kinda hot.

kennydra
Whoa, whoa, too young for fern gully...how old are you people?! or young rather. Getting creeped out.

oogaBooga
I thought this avatar bullshit had something to do with that Avatar: The Last Dickbender cartoon. It's still going to suck even if they're not related.
kiint
AvaTARD amirite?!?

eh?

yeah..??

uh

poorwill
This movie is going to be a poo. A fresh, warm poo slithering down the throats of the filmgoing public.
Sudan no1
good metaphor.

oogaBooga
what metaphor

Jimmy Labatt
I want to punch Stephen Lang in the face repeatedly until he dies.
themilkshark
I'm Crunch Strongjaw, Elite Military Genral Sergeant.
Hugo Gorilla
Bash Ironscrotum, Specialist

kiint
Big McLargehuge, Supply Sergeant

cognitivedissonance
Penis McPenispenis, Penis

ztc
Flog Deadhorse, Smurfwrangler.

Charles
Bob Johnson, Blue Man #2

oogaBooga
klint where the fuck is big mclargehuge from? that was one of my buddy's D&D characters name

OxygenThief
It's from the MST3K version of Space Mutiny.

Caminante Nocturno
So where's the flying buffalo he's always riding?

Are the blue ones supposed to be water benders?

I'm confused.
GravidWithHate
This isn't a movie. This is a tech demo, and taken as such it looks reasonably interesting.
FABIO
Jesus christ. Behind the scenes style interviews with the animated characters?

It is the end of the first decade of the 21st century and they are actually making another Dances with Medicine Man's Ferngully early 90s preachy environmentalist movie?

Not only is it uncanny valley hell, but the attempt at hyper realism for the humans just makes the goofy rubber night elves that much more jarring.
FABIO
oh shit! Those are real people! Is Lang a cartoon corpse in real life too?

pastorofmuppets
Seems to be more about taking over people's shit without asking.

Is there any point anymore, though? Iraq proved we don't even need a reason. Why would we suddenly have a conscience about this sort of thing, because they're blue?

Are movies studios *that* out of touch with reality?

Rosencrantz
Actually, this movie is sorta from the 90s: James Cameron planned it out then, and it ended up in development hell until just recently.

Doctor Arcane
Wait, when he's in the weight room thats a real person? Right? RIGHT? OMG MY MIND.

Also: You know I generally watch and enjoy every movie involving space marines. I enjoy militaristic future space-empires. This movie however, looks clearly to suck. Also why not just neutron bomb them from orbit? Thats what a real space-marine does. Pussies.

StanleyPain
They're not animated. The entire movie isn't CG, just the Navi characters and most of the backgrounds and setting. The humans are just normal filmed actors on sets for the most part.

FABIO
That's why it looks so much worse, putting live people next to this World of Warcraft cutscene garbage.

spikestoyiu
I still think this is going to bomb spectacularly.
Hammer Falls
It'll make some money, surely it'll pass the 0,000,000 mark...but it'll have help from the inflated ticket price of digital 3D features. It will not, however, have longevity. It'll make it's money in the first two weeks, and then fade away... and not in the good "The Abyss" cult film status way.

FABIO
UPDATE 01/2010

Remember when we were this optimistic?

Hammer Falls
And, it's going to be nearly three hours long of this.
j lzrd / swift idiot
I made it exactly six seconds into this before I had to stop. This SO CALLED "FILM" will indeed be a poo of throat-slithering, and I love the industry for it.
wtf japan
The upcoming Christmas blockbuster isn't intellectually stimulating enough for me! I am outraged! OUTRAGED, I tell you!.

Every one of us going to consume a bunch of cortex-numbing chemicals and enjoy the fuck out of this movie. Quit trying to impress the internet and go outside.
poorwill
It looks like absolute shit. I can take dumb - I love dumb! - this is painfully earnest dumb trying to look smart and Important.

Camonk
Hey that trailer pretty much made me want to sleep. James Cameron's last movie was Strange Days. End of story.
Dr. Lobotomy
It's like that ewok shit from Return of the Jedi got stretched out into a full movie...

They're after minerals, so what's the argument against orbital bombardment?
dead_cat
Especially as they would only have to obliterate one of the alien villages, then bring up that incident whenever making negotiations with the other villages.

SolRo
I'll see it, if only to see a 3D movie for the first time
StanleyPain
After having seen all of the clips and such, I'm willing to give the movie a fair chance. I mean, Cameron did make some great sci-fi action movies and this looks to be mostly up his alley as opposed to attempting some embarrassing "epic" drama like Titantic.
Binro the Heretic
Cameron forgot to give Quidditch a big greasy black handlebar moustache.

Now, when he commits his acts of cartoonish evil , he won't be able to twirl it around his index finger and go "MUAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAAAAAH!!!"
HURF BLURF DUH
where's Captain Planet
Nikon
This looks like it's shaping up to be a godawful train wreck of a picture.
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