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Desc:Demonstrates it to his wife on Oprah
Category:Classic TV Clips
Tags:Ebert, oprah, Roger Ebert, vajazzling, voice
Submitted:Enjoy
Date:03/03/10
Views:2246
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Comment count is 50
voodoo_pork
*tears*

Awesome.
Robert DeNegro
That's because the reading of the will keeps getting pushed back.

Frank Rizzo
.....when the fuck did this happen to roger ebert!?

I had no idea!
kingofthenothing
I had no idea he had a black wife, either.

ASubmarineSandwich
I knew both of these things. I win the regional title of Roger EberTrivia Master!

But seriously, read this recent article in Esquire: http://www.esquire.com/features/roger-ebert-0310

If anything, it completely replaces pity with admiration regarding Ebert's condition.

kiint
apparently Ebert had no idea he had a black wife either


Enjoy
Was he color blind or how did he not know?

Desidiosus
I thought that was Oprah at first.

Spit Spingola
That computerized Ebert voice is pretty neat.
chumbucket
two thumbs up....waaaaaay up
Hooper_X
Wow. That looks really uncomfortable.
Mike Tyson?!
Yeah, that Macbook must be burning the shit out of his balls there.

THA SUGAH RAIN
She also said they eat in separate rooms. Because eating for him is absorbing vitamins and minerals through a hole in his stomach and eating for her is... different.
memedumpster
He eats through Quato now.

Syd Midnight
Cobra Commander had that problem too. He once made Destro retch when he barged in on him eating spaghetti. True story..

Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Christ, I haven't seen a picture of him in years. I didn't realize it was that bad :(




augias
That's what he gets for giving Pootie Tang two thumbs down, ok.

ItsAboutTime
"Ain't that something?"
Can't wait for the code to leak so we can read out random IMDB user reviews with his voice.

ps.: I guess his option is better than dying. Still, poor guy. Just a reminder to enjoy your life (and body) every day, everything can be taken away.
Camonk
Thanks for explaining the moral, you Lifetime Original faggot

eatenmyeyes
He should license it for just that purpose.

chairsforcheap
i'm really liking your new direction, Camonk

ItsAboutTime
Just trying to feel good about having a jaw here...

The Mothership
Why is this linked with the pubic rhinestones? I see no vajazzling here.

http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=75669


Enjoy
I thought vajazzling was replacing a body party with something new and sparkly but I may have the definition wrong.

oswaldtheluckyrabbit
Enjoy is correct

Redlof
I prefer the term 'vocal bling'

The Mothership
Fair enough, you sold me.

Camonk
Huh, I should probably see The Hurt Locker.
mon666ster
Sorry, but whenever I look at his face, I think the only noise coming out of it should be an extremely loud banshee like scream.
Rev. Blackson Pollock
I think he looks like a ventriloquists dummy.

boner
His voice is made out of DVD commentary tracks. How awesome is that.
MaulLove
That is pretty appropriate and awesome.

oogaBooga
oh man.. roger...
Cleaner82
Guy lost his entire lower jaw, he eats through his stomach, and he steadfastly refuses to be a fucking sadsack.
Syd Midnight
I'd like to point out that Roger Ebert's power comes from being the most obsessive movie nerd ever, and caring very deeply about what other people say about movies. He is a 21st century hero.

Jeriko-1
Its a shame they couldn't hook him up with a spiffy headcage like Trap-Jaw from He-Man.
petep
or some kind of prosthesis, or some steel bones, or, jesus, anything but that

Princess v2.1
He doesn't want to go through surgery again. (!) Fuck that, give me the goddamned prosthesis.

Syd Midnight
Building yourself hydraulic claws etc would require lots of spare time, and Roger Ebert has movies to watch. He might need a bionic ass if he lives much longer though.

Syd Midnight
ps. IMHO the best method of facial hideosity obfuscation is a cheap plastic halloween mask, except for all the times the police will be taking it off then putting it back on you.

charmlessman
He's giving his wife the, "AHH AHH?!?! What do you think?" face.
Caminante Nocturno
I want someone to replace that program with a copy of Vocaloid. I want to hear his review of Transformers 2 in Hatsune Miku's voice.
Syd Midnight
Trivia: At first Stephen Hawking hated his voice's American accent, but now he refuses to upgrade it to a more modern synth voice because he's had it for so long, that's just how the Hawk rolls.

Unmerciful Crushing Force
Look Cammy, if you want a review in English, you gotta go with Ruka. I know, it sucks but Miku's voice just can't handle the complexity of Roger Ebert.

Riskbreaker
I gladly welcome our new robot-movie critic overlord.
phalsebob
I'm glad he beat the cancer.
KillerGazebo
I can't watch old episodes of The Critic anymore. It begins with a view of the World Trade Center and features a now dead man and a now robot-zombie as frequent guests. It's really depressing.
ShiftlessRastus
Anyone who follows him on twitter knows that he still talks too much.

Also, he's "Half human, half cyborg".
Harveyjames
Yar, you gave Roger Ebert a nickel! He'll be dancin' for hours!
John Holmes Motherfucker
Soon, we'll be able to get programs like this for our computers that read text in famous voices. I'll take the James Earl Jones.
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