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Desc:Rated 'E' for everyone but orphans
Category:Video Games
Tags:orphans, adoption, slow news day, portal 2
Submitted:godot
Date:05/18/11
Views:1889
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Comment count is 46
jyrque - 2011-05-18
what
Xenocide - 2011-05-18
FATHER UPSET OVER VIDEO GAME

StanleyPain - 2011-05-18
Overwrought, kneejerk, white outrage about misunderstood, trivial things is so funny.
Cena_mark - 2011-05-18
Horrible for CBS to try to sell us such fear. Someone needs to tell off Katie Kouric.

spikestoyiu - 2011-05-18
How many times can you try and bait people with pretty much the same exact shit in the one video's comments?

Cena_mark - 2011-05-18
Dammit I'm trying to make a point about your hypocracy. If a local Fox station aired this you'd be like "OMG FAUX NEWS IS SO STUPID." Well I'm calling you jerks out on it.
I

spikestoyiu - 2011-05-18
1) I've never said anything about Fox News and I've been pretty vigilant in ignoring you because you're not a real person and I don't want to encourage whoever is responsible for the Internet's Cena_mark. So I'm not entirely sure who you're talking about.
2) Nobody gives even the slightest of fucks if you insult CBS.

SteamPoweredKleenex - 2011-05-18
Except there's a clearly defined paper trail leading from Fox corporate to what its affiliates air, most notably the lawsuit where they won the right to lie and still call what they put on the air "news."

It's why Fox isn't allowed in Canada. They have these silly standards about not having companies with "we air partisan bullshit' as part of their mission statement.

delicatessen - 2011-05-18
Wait til he finds out about the cake.
kingarthur - 2011-05-18
Bravo, sir.

spikestoyiu - 2011-05-18
Haha, I remember that part of that game.

jangbones - 2011-05-18
tomorrow this station starts a five part expose on the negative comments GlaDOS and Wheatley made about potatoes, including interviews with disgruntled potato farmers
StanleyPain - 2011-05-18
Next on 5: Humans around the globe "upset" at comments made about them by a fictional robot. We'll get their reactions after the break.

ADnova - 2011-05-18
"This game is so offensive. Better keep playing though."
MartinBishop - 2011-05-18
"I immediately turned the game off...but the cameras are here, so get back to playing it honey".

Jeriko-1 - 2011-05-18
Oh fuck, would it ever be funny for Valve to do a GLaDOS video rebuttal!
jangbones - 2011-05-18
if only we knew the person who wrote dialogue for this game!

American Standard - 2011-05-18
No need. 2/3rd through the game, when she's running on a potato battery, she literally says there's nothing wrong with being adopted.

Five stars for fake controversy and utter stupidity.

Cena_mark - 2011-05-18
CBS is run by dumbasses. Is this a segment on 60 Minutes?
Toenails - 2011-05-18
If I respond to you, will you think up a new pun on my name? Maybe something original that I didn't originally come up with? Come on man, think outside the box! FINGERHAMMER or POEmail_it_to_my_asshoole_bitch!!!!

But yeah man, this is a stupid local CBS affiliate story. Classic Slow News Day Syndrome, yes. We get where you are going with this. NOW FUCKING VOTE UP MY SUBMISSION ABOUT THE STUPID KID DRAWING AMERICAN FLAGS AND BEING TOLD HE CAN'T DISPLAY IT NEWS ITEM ALREADY!!!!

Gawd, while you are in the Coast Guard, did you forget that being a part of PoeTV was voting in the Hopper?

Cena_mark - 2011-05-19
Okay Toe(gay)nails.

spikestoyiu - 2011-05-19
Goddamnit, Toenails.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2011-05-22
No if it were 60 Minutes it would be Andy Rooney whining about how the young people don't care about anyone these days, and then he'd look inside his desk for five minutes rambling about paper clips.

fluffy - 2011-05-18
Portal bills itself as educational?
citrusmirakel - 2011-05-18
There's really too many things to comment on here, so I'll just go with this:
"If you are an adopted parent, it was literally the worst thing I could have possibly heard."

Grammar inconsistencies aside, this guy cannot conceive of a sentence which would devastate him more than "Adopted fatty fatty no parents".
Sentences like "Please sit down, I have some very bad news about your daughter" or "I don't love you anymore" or "I'm afraid it's inoperable" - these are all preferable to "Fatty no parents".
kamlem - 2011-05-18
The most offensive thing I saw was the placement of the TV. Poor kids going to die of a broken neck :(

Caminante Nocturno - 2011-05-18
Finally, a group of people that Wheatley can look down on intellectually.

By the way, how did this guy miss all of the adoption comments that preceded the ones they showed?
Xenocide - 2011-05-18
This guy is fucking terrified of the prospect of having to talk with his child.
MartinBishop - 2011-05-18
Maybe he doesn't know Chinese?

Mickerus - 2011-05-18
SOUNDS TO ME LIKE THEY'RE PASSING THE BUCK
Mambazo - 2011-05-18
Five stars for "kid's video game"
voodoo_pork - 2011-05-18
I would like point out, in the game's defense, that the accusations of adoption and obesity are made by a homicidal computer and a moronic computer.

I'd say it's more offensive to computers than anything else!
Severian - 2011-05-18
I hate local Charlotte news. But I guess these dipshits aren't worse than most TV anchors and journalists.

I think Chet and Eric should call WBTV and record it for us.

Mother Lumper - 2011-05-18
What the fuck are you on about? Local Charlotte news is great. About a year ago there was a live helicopter feed of some car thieves trying to evade police, and they cut away a little too late to show the suspects getting caught on foot and beat while in cuffs.

Mr. Purple Cat Esq. - 2011-05-18
gahk!!
does it have graphic vioence or sex?
no.
then it must be for kids then!!!

deadpan - 2011-05-18
This is even funnier after seeing a talk Erik gave at NYU about Portal where he pointed out the real joke was that there was nothing bad about being adopted and GlaDOS was grasping at straws.

But all the fat jokes came directly from him and Chet teasing Jay Pinkerton about his weight.
Dread Pirate Roberts - 2011-05-18
I haven't played Portal 2 yet... but it seems from the video that this is during a climactic part of the story, or at least a major build up to one. I, as a grown man, see that dialogue as funny as shit. It's not a commentary or a direct line to the kids/players at home... it's looks to be in the vein of nonsensical playground taunts.

I'm sure his daughter has heard worse in school and on American Idol... which I'm sure they watch religiously.
Nikon - 2011-05-18
*clears throat*

GET THE FUCK OVER IT.
The McK - 2011-05-18
In The Future, companies seeking to promote a product will ensure that it falls into the hands of a specially-bred human subspecies of "outrage cows" who can then be milked for their anger, which in turn can be processed into free adspace and human interest with which to market it to the rest of the population.
Merzbau - 2011-05-18
I think I speak on behalf of all adoptees everywhere when I say OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE.

Also, guy? The kid isn't pretending she didn't hear it because she doesn't want to talk about a "difficult" issue. I *think* she may have figured out that she's adopted by now. She is pretending she didn't hear it because you are embarrassing the hell out of her on the goddamn TV news.
kanyakumari - 2011-05-18
Rated e for everyone except thin skinned overly sensitive douchebags.
Explodotron - 2011-05-18
"She's sticking to her guns and insisting she didn't hear it." Stars for the daughter ignoring her parents outrage. That, or she didn't hear it.
Mother_Puncher - 2011-05-18
Obviously homescooled and sheltered as fuck. There is no reason for a Chinese kid to go to a public school and not get asked by other kids why she is Chinese and her parents are morons.
Ocyrus - 2011-05-19
Didn't read all the comments (wow, this vid got a bunch, huh?), but did anyone else notice that the taunting portrayed in this segment was actually about obesity. Listen again, adopted-status is ancillary.
erratic - 2011-05-19
5 for the idiot parent. 5 for the idiot news. 5 for poetv comments. I love you guys. yes, I'm drunk.
lustygoat - 2011-05-21
well 5 stars for you too man

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