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Comment count is 45
cognitivedissonance - 2011-06-17

Now taking start-up funds for what we will call the "MATHNASIUM", immediately outside Disney property. A whole week of math and math related activities for the surly little shit that doesn't want to go to Disneyland.

We will serve a special kind of gruel that is even CHEAPER than Dickensian gruel, and the savings will be passed on in Disney Dollars.

WHO WANTS DESSERT - 2011-06-17

You weren't unconditionally overjoyed even though the tv said you would be? TO THE MATHNASIUM! Come back when you're a good little consumer.

glasseye - 2011-06-17

MATHNASIUM sounds a million times better than fucking Disneyland.

Xenocide - 2011-06-17

This is like a choice between an AIDS sandwich and a knife in the eye. Can't we just compromise and go someplace known for its go-karts and/or sex tourism?

memedumpster - 2011-06-17

Go-karts and sex tourism!? Come to Kentucky! You'll stay for the go-karts.

twinkieafternoon - 2011-06-17

I loved the new exhibit "N-Gons From Around the World!" at the MATHNASIUM the last time I went.

notascientist - 2011-06-17

Fuck you, Math is awesome.

SolRo - 2011-06-17

Math sucks, but disney sucks more.

Chemistry World rules though.

pastorofmuppets - 2011-06-18

The MATHNASIUM can be a great time but it can also be dangerous. My brother fell into a tesseract and rotating it the right way to get him out took 3 ride operators and a grad student.

Smellvin - 2011-06-17

Pennsylvania is pretty sweet though. They have people who like to pretend it's Olde Tyme, and you can put ice cream cones on their head and they can't even fight back.

freedoom - 2011-06-17

I live in one of the towns with those people. We also get people that dress up like Jedi and they can fight back with their fake light sabers.

Xenocide - 2011-06-17

In Wisconsin we have Mennonites! They abuse their dogs so badly, we had to pass a law specifically directed at them. Wisconsin is serious and has no time for your games.

Urburos - 2011-06-17

Two words: Colonial Williamsburg.

wtf japan - 2011-06-17

I went to Colonial Williamsburg when I was about this age, and it was fucking SICK!

spikestoyiu - 2011-06-17

Yo at least you have Busch Gardens.

Adham Nu'man - 2011-06-17


charmlessman - 2011-06-17

I'm with the little guy. Disney sucks.

Old_Zircon - 2011-06-17

Yeah, even as a toddler I never understood the appeal.

Oscar Wildcat - 2011-06-17

Same here. Rage on, little man.

I thought this was a dupe, but it's not. There's more than one of these floating around. Gives me hope for the young people today.

Cheese - 2011-06-17

Yeah, cartoons and candy and roller-coasters are for assholes.

pressed peanut sweepings - 2011-06-17

Cartoons and candy and roller coasters are great fun, but you can find far better versions of all of those things in locations far from disney.

spikestoyiu - 2011-06-17

Before I graduated to serious rollercoasters, Disney was great. Some of you must have been indoor kids.

cognitivedissonance - 2011-06-17

Had Dad said "We're going ONLY TO EPCOT!", I'd be inclined to agree.

CJH - 2011-06-17


spikestoyiu - 2011-06-17

Do you legitimately not know what I mean or are you just being a jerkoff?

Doomstein - 2011-06-17

There's nothing to do at Epcot except get really really really drunk in the german section of the world showcase and get thrown out for chasing down and assaulting the Japanese tourists with "borrowed" plastic arms from the gift shop.

pastorofmuppets - 2011-06-18

Pleasure Island was cool... lots of clubs, no cover, everyone's on vacation but the bartender, and there's a bus to take you to your room at 4 am. They shut it down, of course.

IrishWhiskey - 2011-06-17

Those parents will have a much better time with their family if they stop believing in Disney marketing.

Little kids don't magically stop being moody and fickle and burst into storybook delight because Tinkerbell spreads pixie dust when told they're going to Disney. That'll happen when you load him up with sugar and buy him a plastic light-saber at obscene prices. Until five minutes later when he's moody again. Because that's what kids are.

Hodge - 2011-06-17


Robin Kestrel - 2011-06-17

Yes. Plus, I wouldn't like being told we're going somewhere completely different halfway into the trip, no matter what my age. Surprises suck.

Hugo Gorilla - 2011-06-17

No one wants to go to Florida.

pastorofmuppets - 2011-06-17

That kid is wise beyond his years.

Xenocide - 2011-06-17

Fine, then! No Doug Live for you, young man!

Seriously, there has never in human history been a valid reason to set foot in Florida.

delicatessen - 2011-06-17

Yea they actually had to make up shit about cities of gold and fountains of youths to get people to go there.

pressed peanut sweepings - 2011-06-17

OMG, alligators, dude. And wildlife management areas where you can pluck oranges straight from the trees. Just go to the places without people and be a peace.

PhunkThisNoise - 2011-06-17

What an ungrateful little brat. I can understand not liking Disney World and junk, but he's just raining on everybody's parade.

As a kid, my vacations were 'Let's go stay in a motel and swim in the crappy pool! Isn't that fun?'

I woulda given my left and right arms to go to Disneyworld. And then I'd even be able to jump to the front of the line.

kennydra - 2011-06-18

Those were my vacations, too, and I loved them.

StanleyPain - 2011-06-17

Needs "first world problems" tag and "why the terrorists hate us"

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2011-06-18

"My kid doesn't want to go on vacation because he's having issues. What should I do?"
"We should put this up on Youtube so those issues will follow him into high school".

dead_cat - 2011-06-18

"I don't want to go to Florida. How many times do I have to say it before you take your head out of your ass and listen?"

dairyqueenlatifah - 2011-06-18

What an ungrateful little shit.

Jet Bin Fever - 2011-06-19

Oh come on, at least feign enthusiasm little fella. At least while the camera is on. Later on you'll wonder why your sister was always their favorite.

Caminante Nocturno - 2011-06-20

They have every right to be upset, their parents are basing their family's lives around what commercials tell them to do.

bluebeetle - 2011-07-19

I could have empathised with the kid, up until he started saying they should going on both vacations. Now he's just a breast-sucking parasite.

The Mothership - 2020-11-19

Teegan, Brodie, Mollie....

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