Jet Bin Fever I'm sure this guy has people that love him in his life, but his whole existence on the internet makes me really sad. Skip to 1:55 to hear the bra story. It was the highlight of his day and yet... jeezus, I need a drink.
fatatty He does appear to have at least one friend. Of course his friend also seems like a sad and weird person as well. But at least the sad weird people have each other.
Doomstein That hat belongs on a doll, or a small child. If he wants to wear a fedora, wear one from the adult section of the store. Or better yet, go to a men's store and have that head measured. I'm sure there's just enough beavers left on Earth to make a fur felt fedora to accommodate that sucker.
Raggamuffin The little hesitation when he is about to tell you what he saw