Sirs, yes, sirs, over here, I had a question, if I may.
What are Judy's turn-ons? And if I were to, say, put on my own production of Equus, starring me of course, would she be willing to play the part of Jill? What about the part of the horse?
I remember this, it was at the end of my Doug's 1st Movie VHS. It was also Doug's last movie.
Rodents of Unusual Size
Doug's story arc consisted of doing the same shit he always did. Woo, he has a dog. Woo, his sister is a beatnik from the wrong decade.
Skeeter made noises because he had Tourette's Syndrome.
The reason they are weird skin colors is the creator LOVES drugs. A lot.
I'm pretty sure Quailman was a Japanese commercial at some point.
Patti cut her hair because she is totally NOT a big lesbo...duh. She's just "sporty". And wants to wear a strap on. A lot.
The creator actually sodomized Roger with a tree branch after snapping one day and to this day they both go with "nothing ever happened".
Doug and Patti will kiss right before the Purge. Because everyone else died so what the hell.
The creators of this are incredibly creepy.
Today I learned that the people behind Doug were more Doug than Doug could ever hope to be!
Question time, who would you have a beer with? Doug? Skeeter? Patty? Mr. Bones (yes)? Porkchop (hahahah nope)?
The only reason I'd chose Mr. Bones was so we could share stories of how much we hate Doug over a beer.
The people behind Doug are pretty creepy, actually. Like Doug as envisioned by David Lynch.
Between the one guy talking about the dark time in his life, and the other guy discussing his feelings about Roger, I don't think I'll ever look at Doug the same way again.
THOUSANDS of questions. THOUSANDS.
I remember this sex ed video they showed us in 7th grade, animated by this guy. It was clearly pre-Nickelodeon Doug and Pattie Mayonnaise, nude, with the usual "you will start getting hair in strange places" spiel. It was obviously made about a decade before, and the entire class stared in horror at seeing Doug Funnie and Pattie Mayonnaise nude, sprouting pubic hair and becoming adults.
God, I wonder if it's on Youtube.
Is it wrong that I kind of want to see that?
I'm amazed that there are even three questions to ask about "Doug," let alone ten. "Doug" was what I flipped past when "Rocko's Modern Life" or "Ren & Stimpy" wasn't on.
One time I posted a YouTube comment where I praised that "Doug: The Movie" live-action trailer as being an epic reshaping of a boring-ass cartoon. I was met with negative downvotes and one individual calling me an idiot who possessed no analytical or critical thinking skills because "Doug" was beautiful and symbolic and metaphorical and brilliant social commentary and how dare I. I opted not to argue with this person—some battles just aren't worth it.
You're an idiot.
I won't defend Doug's social commentary or raw aethsteic merits against you; if you're the sort of sophisticate who considers anything less than "Ren & Stimpy" to be beneath him, then clearly "Doug" is not for you
But the music, man, the music! Banging on a Trashcan? Killer Tofu? Surely, you can concede that Doug was Nickelodeon's resident Orpheus?
|Rodents of Unusual Size |
I just want to add that there seemed to be a plethora of creepy, shitty cartoons in the 90s that took place "today" but were actually "the 50s". Goof Troop was another. I know there were more. It always bothered me. It's like the creators were trying to go back in time by forcing their childhoods on modern times as a whitewash of everything that happened since.
I never really noticed that before.
I agree and now I hate what was done to my childhood. Why would I want some post-WWII era grandpa forcing his bygone universe into my cartoons? Why did the dog-people have to live in white untarnished suburbia? Does this mean Max, Pete, Patti and Doug tripped on psychedelics and experimented in free-love orgies when the cracker dimension imploded into the 1960s?
The decor at the Jumbo Picture headquarters is a god damn suicide machine. Why would anyone do that?
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