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Desc:Buffalo Bill's older brother shows us all an innovation for which he will bear no liability.
Category:Horror, Horror
Tags:cucumber, vacuum, fleshlight, mason jar, catastrophic penile trauma
Submitted:William Topaz McGonagall
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Comment count is 14
Chocolate Jesus - 2013-08-07
I think you mean Karl Childers.
fedex - 2013-08-07
leave some comments!

candyheadrobot - 2013-08-07
Wonder how long it took him to figure this out, with the pressure, the suction, and how many cucumbers he crushed. In a way, he's like an Edison of sleeze.
Nominal - 2013-08-07
Maybe the stigma against male masturbation devices is simply a matter of engineering. It takes a lot more work to simulate a lubed vagina than a dong, so guys come off as tryhards?
Old_Zircon - 2013-08-07
I've known a couple people who were really in to this kind of stuff and open about it and based on that I feel the stigma is well deserved, because they were just all around maladjusted and creepy, every one of them.

Adham Nu'man - 2013-08-07
"I can't be held liable if you rip your dick off."

Sure, that looks like a brilliant idea.
chumbucket - 2013-08-07
Visits to the late night ER with a Mason jar stuck on one's parts.

fedex - 2013-08-08
beats a toolbox lodged in your rectum, I guess

Jet Bin Fever - 2013-08-07
I wouldn't recommend sticking your penis into any kind of glass container. Unless your goal is an embarrassing trip to the ER, in which case, go for it!
Cherry Pop Culture - 2013-08-07
This seems like more trouble than it's worth :/
chumbucket - 2013-08-07
Jerking off should never be this complicated.
Blue - 2013-08-07
Jerking off should be incredibly complicated and involve hundreds if not thousands of dollars of equipment. If you want to do it right, that is.

I can't think of any other activity that people are so damn insistent on being lazy. If you guys ate like you jerked off you would never use a microwave, let alone an oven. You'd eat cereal and milk every day. And then you'd pat yourselves on the back and congratulate yourselves for not being as obsessed with tasting good things as other people.

Shame on you all!

Old_Zircon - 2013-08-07
Counterpoint: these newfangled "labor saving devices" are the lazy way.

chumbucket - 2013-08-08
I have at least one hand, done.

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