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Desc:He's just saying that to get people to see HIS movie
Category:Religious, Crime
Tags:satan, asshole, Rick santorum, frothy, The Christmas Candle
Submitted:Hailey2006
Date:11/06/13
Views:1356
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Comment count is 21
Hailey2006
Sylvester McCoy is one of the stars of his movie, but Whovians and Ringers haven't really been talking about it!

Oh, yeah and it's also Susan Boyle's feature film debut!
SteamPoweredKleenex
For those interested, his movie is called "The Christmas Candle."

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2739338/

Either the candle is supposed to be a symbolic penis, or (if Sylvester McCoy is the candlemaker) the Doctor was just trying to explain away his sonic screwdriver to the primitive locals.

deadpan
Oh it's well established that anyone who has ever played the Doctor is also secretly the Doctor in every other role in his or her career.

That's why Withnail & I is the greatest multi-Doctor story ever.

SteamPoweredKleenex
There's a similar game some people play where every role played by Daniel Radcliffe is him being Harry Potter while working undercover for the Ministry of Magic. I don't think it works as well, but hey, people get bored.

SteamPoweredKleenex
Also, I didn't really care for Sylvester McCoy's Doctor. I know the show was being fucked by the douche running the BBC at the time (even if you don't like the show, it was a guaranteed money-maker, and he was hell-bent on killing it by screwing with it any way he could), but McCoy just seemed to always be ACTING! instead of acting.

Bort
"Oh it's well established that anyone who has ever played the Doctor is also secretly the Doctor in every other role in his or her career."

So ... Worzel Gummidge was the Doctor keeping tabs on the Family of Blood? Clever.

"Also, I didn't really care for Sylvester McCoy's Doctor."

He wasn't my favorite either, but he was far from the worst, and there were some decent stories in his run. "Battlefield" was near the end, but I would recommend watching it -- the Brigadier is a key player and is in top form. They actually go to the trouble of fleshing out even the throwaway characters, and even the bad guys have admirable traits (most of them anyway).

memedumpster
The video is gone, unfortunately, so I'm just here to recommend Ghostlight.

Caminante Nocturno
Hey look, the guy who was too shitty to get the Republican nomination is talking about a movie.
Quad9Damage
The guy who inspired shitty, shitty candidates to crawl out of their roach holes and promise that a vote for them was a vote for the United States of Jesus and sending women back to reproductive rights free kitchens, policies that ultimately handed Obama his second term.

The guy who came dangerously close to winning the Primary because of awful people who'd love to usher in a fascist Christian theocracy and say "fuck you" to the rest of us.

The guy who brayed on and on about how individual freedoms are evil, how the government ought to be in people's bedrooms, how birth control is evil, contraception is evil, and how public schools don't have enough Republican Jesus in them to keep children firmly planted on the Right...and again, this guy came close to beating Romney.

The guy who allegedly brought home a dead fetus for his seven spawn to play with.

That guy. That guy is making a movie.

Oscar Wildcat
When you put it that way, it sounds like a hella great movie and one I'd love to watch.

Quad9Damage
I can't wait for the deleted scene where The Christmas Candle plants an aborted fetus right back in a rape victim's uterus. There are no returns on gifts from God.

Caminante Nocturno
Don't forget his passionate hatred for higher education, and calling Obama a 'snob' for believing more people need to go to college.

StanleyPain
Considering that Adam Sandler can still make millions just from farting on camera, Santorum might have a point.
Sudan no1
Everyone knows who actually controls Hollywood. I see what you did there Santy.

ashtar.
Satan's work with the music industry has been pretty amazing overall. All those tortured heroin addicts made some good albums before they killed themselves. You'd think that if Our Dark Lord were involved with Hollywood we'd be seeing better output.
SteamPoweredKleenex
I'd say the ones who took massive amounts of drugs were the ones who weren't on the devil's payroll.

N'Sync, The Backstreet Boys, One Direction, Justin Bieber... I mean, how else would they sell CDs?

Oscar Wildcat
In this, the Devil is practically minded. To grant fame, he just buys up all the copies of the CD or DVD or whatnot hisself. This is why so many terrible acts sell millions of copies yet no one you know actually listens to them. Slim Whitman is the prototype, but you may be more familiar with Yanni.

Oscar Wildcat
...Hell is, in fact, a giant incinerator for all those plastic clamshells and cardboard liner notes.

cognitivedissonance
Satan won't let Rob Schneider work again, so hail Satan.
SteamPoweredKleenex
According to Schneider, that would be "liberals," not Satan, since that's the final refuge of has-been entertainers who didn't have a lot of talent to begin with and can't get work anymore.

Quad9Damage
The trailer apparently died in the Hopper, the same link I just tried to submit:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2fzS13Qdj0

It's no "God Is Not Dead," but I'm expecting a 99% chance of Christmas schmaltz.
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