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Desc:>:(
Category:Cartoons & Animation, Crime
Tags:hollywood, cocaine, shit, the throne of god is empty, the barrel with no bottom
Submitted:Killer Joe
Date:05/16/17
Views:680
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Comment count is 42
garcet71283
So is blue-haired-in-stocking-cap the new pixie-girl or something?
Old_Zircon
Not so new.

Nikon
She's the "triggered" emoji.

dairyqueenlatifah
Hey, this trailer uses the same music as the Jack and Jill trailer!
Nikon
I'm not sure if there's a
" why does this exist " tag, but there ought to be one.
TeenerTot
This makes me want to kill myself! :D
Maggot Brain
They made this but the pass on my movie pitch. It was called HANDGUN about a man who had GUNS for hands and all he wanted was to be loved!
15th
I know the feeling. My film about con men sneaking into horse shows and derbies to beat off thoroughbreds to sell their jizz on the black market keeps getting hard passes. Its called "Hard Passes."

Maggot Brain
Please tell me that there is a rom-com sub plot.

15th
I just brewed a pot of coffee.

infinite zest
Wasn't this movie announced sometime before the Angry Birds movie came out and people were finally like "we're done with this shit?" I mean, it's a sub-par Inside Out by the looks of it, but it's not like Inside Out came up with this mini-persona-verse (Woody Allen? Herman's Head?) But if I recall the main complaint with Angry Birds was always in conjunction with the inevitable release of this film as well. I actually figured Sony had scrapped the whole thing and used a lot of the animation for Sausage Party, because if you can't beat em, out-gross them for the audience that's been cultivated to hate this kinda of shit.

infinite zest
@15th I'd watch that movie! Did you know that at one time some of your tax dollars were going towards Dolphin research that involved jerking off the dolphins? If that continued we'd have IRL Johnny Mnemonic VR Dolphins and shit swimming around. Make it about drug addiction too and you could Warhorse/Seabiscuit the shit out of it!

Michael Horse in Citizen Mane

fedex
stars for the (linked!) tags
Old_Zircon
So is this finally coming out? I've been waiting for like two years now.
Old_Zircon
So is the Unrated Director's Cut DVD going to include all of the deleted scenes featuring 8===D or what?
infinite zest
Yep. And commentary by 5318008

Scrimmjob
I work with a guy who I know is going to love this, and I'm going to have to hear him chortle about how funny it was. He was the same guy who loved Sausage Party, but was bummed that he couldn't bring his kids.
il fiore bel
Come on, it's not all about the shit emoji!
Xenocide
Do Sony's execs have video of Patrick Stewart killing somebody?

garcet71283
Yeah, his credibility!

Hayooo

infinite zest
Who says he's got good taste? Honestly the only Trek Captain who actually seems to like the non-captain stuff that inevitably comes after Star Trek is Kate Milgrew. If Singer's X-Men had not been in the works at that time, Xavier probably would've been some other, more famous actor, like MacKellen for instance. But Stewart fit the role all too well, looks = check. former leadership experience = check. Basically it was the same role. And with the exception of a Transmetropolitan adaptation that Stewart apparently showed much interest in, his non-Trek/Xmen stuff has all been shit like Blunt Talk and lending way too much of your voice to a shitty Seth McFarlane ripoff of a shitty Seth McFarlane show.

BHWW
Who says Hollywood is out of ideas? I mean this movie features both an apocalyptic disaster that must be averted and a "LEARN TO BE YOURSELF" plotline.
blue vein steel
To be fair, it's unlikely T.J. Miller even realized he was making a movie.
infinite zest
That could also be said for the new season of Silicon Valley.

Redford
The plot for this seems unerringly similar to that of Food Fight.

Or am I just going mad from watching too much Mister Rodgers?
TeenerTot
It looks to me like they stole the script from Inside Out, replaced the emotions with emojis, and replaced the emotional resonance with poop jokes.

Old_Zircon
Cult of individuality plotlines are as old as the marketers who sell us shit we don't need to fill he empty holes deep inside ourselves that come from being trained to believe we're just a bunch of islated, sovereign individuals.

It's been the only thing propping up the American economy for the last 100 years or so. Which means if you hate this movie you're basically the same as ISIS.

Mr. Purple Cat Esq.
Yeah, but youre only an individual if u have blue hair.

Old_Zircon
Wait, does that mean I've been wearing these steampunk goggles for nothing all this time?

TeenerTot
I'm sure your goggles will save your eyes from an errant newspaper rubber band.

But it's a little late for Lenny.

simon666
Was that Steven Wright at :35?
Hugo Gorilla
Sony isn't even trying anymore. Just slap together anything that a might appeal to the broadest audience possible and let marketing handle it.
Seven Arts/H8 Red
Give this film SOME credit for not crossing over with The Swan Princess...yet.

infinite zest
Eh.. it's Sony. Non-digital music is dead and movies are the next thing to, so put your eggs in your videogames and fund them with the 3D Pixar-lite shit that'll sell one way or another, and presto. K GTG #CoD.

Meerkat
Thanks Obama.
Xenocide
What's going on with the first five seconds? Why does every trailer now need to be led off by a mini-advertisement for itself? THEY'RE MAKING TRAILERS FOR TRAILERS WHICH PLAY RIGHT BEFORE THE TRAILERS.

There's no emoticon for what I'm feeling!
cognitivedissonance
1. I am ready to reconsider Sausage Party a misunderstood classic.

2. EGGPLANT WOULD NOT BE IN THE GROUP OF UNUSED EMOJIS.
infinite zest
Remember when the mobile community was a-twitter about the Gun emoji getting taken off the regular emoji list and you had to pay for it? Maybe Sony can promote this movie by bringing the gun back, for free. It might not fire yet, but Rome wasn't built in a day..

infinite zest
actually I take that back. I tried watching Sausage Party on Netflix just now and I think I made it to about 3:00 mark with the soy sauce bottles with Fu Manchu mustaches. Emoji movie almost sounds tolerable in comparison.

betamaxed
Sony Pictures
threerow
They're still going through with this? I thought they cancelled it after everyone said it was stupid
Old_Zircon
When has that ever stopped them?

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