|gotterdamm - 2008-04-16 |
Yes! That's the angsty bile I missed so much.
Also, The Special+Ian Dury = win.
|StanleyPain - 2008-04-16 |
He's certainly more charitable than I. I gave up on it way earlier than 50%. It starts strong but the shitty ICP villian and the whole "sonic devices driving people crazy" thing just killed it. Sorry Sega but clowns stopped being scary as story devices in games right around the time fucking CarnEvil was released, and maybe before that.
I also didn't really like how the game continually punishes you for exploring. What's in here? BAM LOSE HALF YOUR LIFE TO AN ENEMY YOU COULDN'T HAVE POSSIBLY SEEN COMING. Or...HEY THERE'S A SONIC THINGY REALLY WELL HIDDEN IN HERE SO LOOK FOR IT, BUT ALL THE WHILE YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE TONS OF HEALTH, OK?
Clown guy is actually just an alcoholic hallucination that disappears partway through and has no real bearing on the plot.
That's even better.
"Hey guys this villain is kind of stupid."
"Eh..we'll just make him an alcoholic hallucination later on in the game."
It's actually kind of interesting because he personifies a literal "alcohol demon" whom you defeat in a dream and then no longer have the "drink to aim better" mechanic. But yeah, it probably went something like what you said.
|Squeamish - 2008-04-16 |
I haven't enjoyed a ZP this much in quite some time. Yahtzee really does shine when he legitimately hates a video game.
Also, extra stars for "a serial killer chasing you in a house kind of like YOURS! There he is, under your bed! Now he's right behind you! No, don't look around, because that'll really piss him off!"
|andru strange - 2008-04-16 |
you know what'd be really cool... if any new console games where good.
Console games where good what? Good violence happens? Don't leave us hanging!
I see what you did there, arthur.
|Monchiles Monchiles - 2008-04-16 |
That's the second Dragonballz reference in a row for Yahtzee.
|wtf japan - 2008-04-16 |
"White as a snowman with a bukake fetish." I must be his retarded twin.
|happy_ending - 2008-04-16 |
Snooker loopy is my new favorite phrase.
|Hooker - 2008-04-16 |
Best one in a long while.
|Adramelech - 2008-04-16 |
Feh, storyline had a nice pulp sci-fi feel and ties directly into the backstory of the first game, assuming you were actually paying attention (which I will assume that Yahtzee does not). Even the sonic devices were a part of the storyline.
The problem with Condemned 2 is that the gameplay takes a sharp nosedive post-bear sequence. The last two levels are just bafflingly bad and feel like they came from a completely different game.
|vissarion - 2008-04-17 |
Unrelenting grit and terrified wee.
|Frank Rizzo - 2008-04-17 |
How is this funny?
If you don't play video games, you're not going to get it.
will the personal hygiene product provide comedy that is lacking here?
you are a fucking dope
|Cap'n Profan!ty - 2008-04-17 |
I don't play console games, and I get it.
|Caminante Nocturno - 2008-04-17 |
I'm still not eating a cake that has had errant turds on it at one point.
|Bone_Vulture - 2008-04-17 |
Any reference to Indigo Prophecy gets five stars. That game is a textbook example of progressively worsening plot. It's like the first quarter was written by a person who could make a gritty David Fincher movie. Then the writer is replaced by a handful of teenagers who think that The Matrix was the deepest movie _EVER_.
|KnowFuture - 2008-04-18 |
FREE SWORDS they're pretty sharp
anything with Ian Dury: +5 anyway.
|chumbucket - 2008-04-18 |
Session 9 was actually pretty cool
|Pie Boy - 2008-04-23 |
The Specials and David Caruso equals five stars.
If only I actually cared about this game.
|j lzrd / swift idiot - 2008-05-07 |
HEY! That bag of sick WAS the charisma!
Also, I want Yahtzee's music library.
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