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Desc:If Johnny Cash could, he'd kill himself.
Category:Stunts, Horror
Tags:American Idol, Johnny Cash, ring of fire, please be a joke
Submitted:heyitslozeau
Date:03/18/09
Views:2796
Rating:
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Resubmit:Lauritz Melchior
Resubmit:pastorofmuppets
Resubmit:Oktay

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Comment count is 39
zatojones
jesus christ
biclops
Do I give this 5 stars for evil?
Do I give 1 star because I hate heyitslozeau with the fire of a million suns for subjecting me to this.

I think I'll just close the tab and pretend this never happened.
heyitslozeau
IS IT LIKE YOU FEEL INTO A BURNING RING OF FIRE?


Rovin
You give it five because it's truly evil, from the misguided arrangement to his stupid ass would-be seductive heavy breathing vocal style. "Shit, this is gonna suck, I'll try to sexy it up so the sixteen year old girls will keep me on the show."

chumbucket
I imagine Cash scalping this guy on stage....with his bare hands
Spastic Avenger
Me and my dad used to change this song to peurile curry jokes. I think even our version had more credibility than this abortion.

'curry is a burning thing/and it brings a fiery ring/vindaloo is my desire/but it left me with a ring of fire'
kennydra
God, my friend loves this guy. He cannot sing and this is atrocious.

And my dad and I used to sing a rap version of this as a joke to annoy my mom. That was so much better than this.
TeenerTot
So why the picture of Kelly Osborne?
Xiphias
what an asshole!
Disaster
HOLY GOD MAKE IT STOP!
kingarthur
Um...yeah. It's not written in an Eastern scale, so your arrangement is null, void and at best, a crime against humanity. I get the feeling whoever arranged this thought to himself: "That version of All Along The Watchtower on Battlestar Galactica is really cool. I wonder if I can use my retard strength to copy that beautiful arrangement into an abortion of sound?"


pastorofmuppets
I just looked up that BSG "Watchtower" and I'm sorry but it's no more "cool" than the video above.

spikestoyiu
Yeah, like this guy is gay enough to watch Battlestar Galactica.

nuzzles
Keep in mind, this shit doesn't just happen magically and spontaneously (no matter how badly they want you to believe that)- it all has to be rigged up by show producers. That means there was probably a whole damn team of people who agreed to this.

Though I haven't seen this show in a long while, so maybe they've finally cheaped out and have turned it into "get contestants liquored up and see what happens with the onstage Singalodeon".
IrishWhiskey
Just by a quick Google search, it seems that most reviews of the episode said he did very well, and though Simon wrong.

So yeah, they know their tone-deaf, tasteless audience.

mr666
My girlfriend makes me watch this damn show every week, and while usually the preformances are just so boring I find myself falling asleep, this had me staring slack jawed at the screen the whole time. I think Simon said it best when he said "What the hell was that?"


heyitslozeau
HEY, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED TO ME!




fucking girlfriends.

allcaps
ENOUGH WITH THE FUCKING SONGSMITH VIDEOS.

Jesus.
Rovin
If I had more stars, they'd be yours.

Randroid
I'd prefer polka'd to the xtreme instead of this.

IrishWhiskey
"I fell for you, like a Chiiiiaaaaaiiiillllddduuhh. Oooooooohhh babadaduuuuudayyyyyy"(???)

Are the people in the background cheering because Simon Cowell just pulled a gun? I can't think of any other reason.
NewHeavenSalesman
From the resubmit:

"Wow.

I doubt that anyone (Johnny Cash included) ever sang this song in such a way that it captured the idea of going down into hell, which is the essence of the song. It could only be sung in the strange, bizarre fashion that Adam Lambert sings it.

The fact that Simon could say "What the hell was that" demonstrates his clueless regarding music. It was, Simon, an musically artistic descent into hell. You might think that that is a bad thing, but for this song it was the only thing."

I'm speechless.
Hooper_X
well, he's kind of right. I mean, that was quite literally a musical trip into hell.

Also, DAMNIT I WANTED TO SUBMIT THIS ONE. too slow.

Merzbau
WALL OF VOODOO COCKFUCKERS.

I've watched the occasional bit of American Idol this season and I've been praying for this ridiculous manchild's onstage demise ever since I first laid eyes on him.

MerryMisanthrope
5 for both Johnny Cash by way of Nine-Inch-Nails, and YouTube commentors not knowing enough to call it out as such. Still not as bad as Sanjaya and the Kinks, though.

mashedtater
When you gaze in to the abyss, this is what is serenaded back to you.

gambol
ugh
StanleyPain
Isn't this like the 50th idiotic, hipster, shit-filled remake of Ring of Fire?
RomancingTrain
This is marvelously awful. I am going to iTunes immediately to purchase it.
Frank Rizzo
as always, youtube comments of gold.

"There are pictures of Pete Wentz making out with guys all over the place.. he's obviously not gay. He's married to a WOMAN. Just because they kiss guys doesn't make them gay."
allcaps
You know what? I'm actually going to admit to sort of liking this. Sorry to be queer, but there it is.
keinsignal
what are your feelings on unicorns?

Son of Slam
Allcaps is not fit to be amongst civilized people, apparently.

Blaise
Awesome rendition.
RomancingTrain
And he's still on the show.
RandomFerret
Calling it now. The Fifth Element 2.
KnowFuture
I like to think Stan Ridgeway would be more pissed off about this rendition than Johnny Cash would, and not just because Ridgeway is still alive, either.
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