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Desc:...this might be one of the finest local news pieces I have ever seen...
Category:Educational, Educational
Tags:party, bro, western Michigan, epic bro legend
Submitted:Jack Dalton
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Comment count is 26
The Mothership

The guy still passed out. Holy shit. Epic Bro Legend.
That's what turned this from a 5* to a favorite.

Pretty much, also the guy is damn right about the parents of the 14 year olds complaining.

infinite zest
Now we know that MDMA will make James Taylor young again! I always thought it just made the Crows in the sky plot your every move, mocking you. Always mocking you.

Floor Bro is an inspiration to us all.

Oscar Wildcat
You all seem so sure Floor Bro is still breathing.

Floor Bro made me so happy.

I like to think that he passed out at 11PM but only became Floor Bro at around 6AM, after a sufficient amount of people had left the house.

Floor Bro is my totem animal.

The Mothership
Floor Bro is my new favorite expression of 2014.

I can't decide if I want to punch him for the chinmuff or the squeaky voice
James Woods
Maybes, like, look beyond minute inconsequential uncontrollable physical attributes and see a pretty chill human being, I dunno.

Somebody jealous.

It's you, jangbones. You're jealous.

Party at my house! C'mon poetv, we got this fucker.
I'll bring the 14 year old whores!

The Mothership

infinite zest
I used to go to fall out Boys' parties on Lake Michigan and this is some pussy ass shit. Eastern Wisconsin forever!

I imagine Fall Out Boy parties would be packed floor to ceiling with 14 year old whores.

14 year old -bisexual- whores.

I wonder what that unrepentant Australian party kid is doing now. He seemed cool.
Corey? He grew up, matured a bit and got married.
The best bit of the follow-up piece I read on him is that he works as an "Event Organizer"...so, now he organizes parties for a living.
Happily ever after. :D

"and the sexual assault of a 19-year-old Mount Pleasant woman"

I imagine that's what the rapist was thinking: "mount pleasant woman".
Old People
I'm having a kegger this weekend and if we get at least one Floor Bro, I will count it a success.
Truly, people are idiots everywhere:

Rodents of Unusual Size
Party Guy cautions parents to watch their kids.

What a great role model!
Needs a James Taylor tag.
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