Xenocide The Onion needs more recurring characters. Bring this guy and Joad Cressbeckler back!
Hooker The Onion would run this into the ground if they made it recurring.
Camonk Okay, Onion, you've peaked! Stop now! It took you, what, ten years to get to this point? You don't want a slow slide to obsolescence.
IrishWhiskey As a comrade in our great society, I am particularly grateful with how the on-button is always on a different place on my computers. Praise be to our illustrious leaders for doing away with the imperialist and unharmonious typewriters!