IrishWhiskey      Just when I thought it couldn't get any better, the dramatic ending struck me like a 2x4.
A PUBLICLY OWNED 2X4 THAT TEARS INTO MY SOUL!
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glasseye      Comedy gold.
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garcet71283      Looks like he could be a relative of Steve Sutton.
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athodyd      this is a pretty accurate summation of libertarian philosophy
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Menudo con queso      Conscious or unconscious parody? Either way, he hit it out of the park.
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Blaise      Audition tape for the role of Andrew Ryan.
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Camonk      I used to think libertarians were just the worst Americans. I'm starting to think they're actually the worst people.
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UnderANeonHalo      So what office is he running for? I'm liking his platform so far.
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Cleaner82 His platform is a rock in a city park.
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Paranatural      You know, it's hard to mock libertarians when they do such a good job of it themselves.
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egglab      damned libertarian vogons.
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SteamPoweredKleenex      "Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
If he did, he'd charge some fees
Just to walk beneath these trees.
He's such a greedy little ass
And makes us buy a damn FastPass."
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zatojones      Damn you sidewalks!
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Cheese      Now that is some high fucking art.
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hornung      feyd
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FABIO Feyd despised libertarians.
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FABIO All he did was point out the retarded dogpile of retards wanting to feel smug as they retardedly dogpiled on assumption that Ron Paul PERSONALLY penned the newsletter despite the fact that rival campaigners dropped the issue because there wasn't anything there, which is pretty retarded but hey it's another chance to type out GOOGLE RON PAUL with five hundred other unoriginal fucks whose Something Awful forum account checks must have bounced so they came here.
There's also the ancient thread where Feyd outright calls Libertarians childish and retarded, but GOOGLE RON PAUL!!!!11!
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KnowFuture      Obsession. By Ayn Rand.
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Sick Man      NOW THERE'S NO MORE OAK OPPRESSION
FOR THEY PASSED A NOBLE LAW
AND THE TREES ARE ALL KEPT EQUAL
BY HATCHET
AXE
AND SAW
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pastorofmuppets Someone should tell that dude when Rush lyrics have your poetry beat by 100x it's time to put the pencil down.
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wart      Ah, the old "12 lines of libertarianism and an atheist couplet on the end" structure still works a charm.
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Stopheles      "I walked on the sidewalk...but it belonged to THE PUBLIC (which is why I was able to walk on it in the first place)"
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Wonko the Sane     ART
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Old_Zircon      I kind of expected Rush concert footage.
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Cleaner82      "Get-the-fuck-off-my-lawnitarians"
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The Townleybomb      If possible, I'd add a star for this guy not being 22 and another for him apparently being in New York City, which is just about the least libertarian place imaginable.
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Hooker      A twist ending!
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bopeton      Thomas Jefferson would be proud.
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joelkazoo      Reminds me of a great Berke Breathed quote:
"I'd be [a Libertarian], if they weren't all a bunch of tax-dodging, self-righteous pricks."
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