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Category:News & Politics, Advertisements
Tags:dominos, white people, vocaloid
Submitted:Spaceman Africa
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Comment count is 62
EvilHomer - 2013-03-07
I was all set to rant about Dominos being evil and Miku selling out, but then the pizza box thing happened and I was sold.

You win this round, Dominos marketing team.
Cena_mark - 2013-03-07
God forbid a product of Yamaha selling out.

EvilHomer - 2013-03-07
Miku used to stand for something. Now she's just in it for the money.

Hooker - 2013-03-07
Domino's Pizza nail polish
Cena_mark - 2013-03-07
This guy seems hardly excited at all. But now I realize he's just disappointed that this isn't coming to the USA. I know I am.
EvilHomer - 2013-03-07
Is this service really only available in Japan? I was going to get together with my one Apple product buying friend and try it out, but if she won't dance for American pizzas, then there's no point.

Jet Bin Fever - 2013-03-07
This guy is a massive Hatsune Miku fan. Don't question his loyalty!
Oscar Wildcat - 2013-03-07
You make it sound like he _doesn't_ have a 12 year old asian girl duct taped to the hot water heater in the basement of his mansion.

Caminante Nocturno - 2013-03-07
Personal experience tells me it's safe to assume that about everyone you meet.

Old_Zircon - 2013-03-07
So many things about this scream "parody" and yet...
The Mothership - 2013-03-07
The grin at 1:03.
chumbucket - 2013-03-07
I agree my stars for the "let me whip this out" moment.

Riskbreaker - 2013-03-07
Pizza kids, are you going to let this virtual doll stand in your way? This agression should not stand!
Caminante Nocturno - 2013-03-07
Hatsune Miku is the future of pizza.
Boxhead - 2013-03-07
Tim and Eric are starting to get weird.
Adham Nu'man - 2013-03-07
The gross loneliness of home-delivered corporate pizza, stupid useless apps designed to fill minutes of your horrible empty life and the pseudopedo obsession over a fake teenage girl that makes awful bleep-bloop music all finally combined!
Oscar Wildcat - 2013-03-07
The question we need to ask is: if we could go back in time and kill Phillip K. Dick, could we prevent this horrible future that he imagined for us?

Caminante Nocturno - 2013-03-07
Maybe not, but at least it would cut down on the sanctimony people keep spouting about it.

Adham Nu'man - 2013-03-07
You're right Caminante this is totally not embarassing.

Oscar Wildcat - 2013-03-07
I'm sorry Cam, but this whole replacing of the real with the artificial just stinks of Dick, if you know what I mean.

Oscar Wildcat - 2013-03-07
BTW, how do you control the tentacle in this app?

badideasinaction - 2013-03-07
The only difference between Hatsune Miku and any pop star is the pop star is pretending to be real.

flotsam - 2013-03-07
A man was seated on his bed before a box of Domino's pizza. The silence in the room was punctuated by the lone whistle of a train. The man's palms began to sweat as he accessed the Domino's app on his phone. He sniffed a tear of joy when Hatsune Miku's energetic performance began. His darkened room, littered with pizza boxes, now seemed a world away. Hatsune Miku smiled brightly at him during the photo shoot as he snapped a few pictures of her standing beside him. When he examined the picture, he swore could hear her whisper, "It's okay, you're not alone." After the photo shoot, he ate his pizza in silence.

memedumpster - 2013-03-07
We did, and no it didn't.

Adham Nu'man - 2013-03-07
Picture a 35 year old woman who's really really really into Justin Bieber. Now picture Justin Bieber is a cartoon robot. This adult woman is really into a cartoon robot Justin Bieber and she wants an app that lets her order junk food while she takes pretend pictures of herself hanging out with the Robo-biebs.

That woman is you guys.

Caminante Nocturno - 2013-03-07
Because once a woman hits her 30s, she's not worth fucking, right?

You goddamn sexist.

Adham Nu'man - 2013-03-07
Yes that was totally my point of course.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-07
My life is also terrible, but I like pizza.

Craptabulous - 2013-03-07
Caminante, just because you're not worth fucking doesn't imply that the woman would be.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-08
I love the use of "psuedopedo", which seems to imply that one is lacking the necessary integrity to succeed as a pedophile.

Kabbage - 2013-03-07
Never again will the white people tag be so utterly, impossibly appropriate.
John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-07
I've been critical of the WP tag in the past, but this time I have to throw up my hands and shout AMEN!

SolRo - 2013-03-07
I'm confused as to why a fat american white guy is trying to sell miku branded pizza and pizza ordering app to the japanese.

Was licencing her as the spokesperson too expensive?

This guy lose a bet?

Or most likely he's trying to get popular with japanese schoolgirls for completely not rape-y reasons.

Kabbage - 2013-03-07
I get the feeling it's common in Japan for the head of a company to present new items and features in commercials over there. This probably sounds way less awkward if you don't speak English.

Old_Zircon - 2013-03-07
I've heard something to the effect of what Kabbage said, myself. It must be true if we've both heard it.

Sudan no1 - 2013-03-08
There's a trend of casting white people with bad Japanese pronunciation in ads for shameful otaku shit, I think it's supposed to make the target audience feel better about themselves - "at least I'm not as embarrassing as these goofy white motherfuckers!"

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-07
In the early sixties, the Flinstones did cigarette commercials. If you take the long view, there's nothing especially evil or brave-new-worldish about this, and it's kind of cool that actual Japanese Dominos employees were involved in writing the song, even though the song seems pretty lame.

I don't know anything about Apple, (like, will the app work on iphones worldwide. If Dominos is smart, they'll sell you one of those Pizza boxes through the internet. Or maybe you can get one on ebay.
SolRo - 2013-03-07
There's a seperate japan-only itunes where the jewels of the world are horded away from the rest of us.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-07
You seem to be joking, but I do not know or care. It's not at all implausible that Apple would alter the platform in different places to "prevent piracy" or whatever. In the Walled Garden of iPhone, the wall is wherever Apple wants to put it. People who have iPhones know whether this will work or not.

My only son is a transsexual, and an Apple user. It took some time, and some personal growth, but I've managed to accept his choice to use Apple products.

EvilHomer - 2013-03-07
Jesus. Your son is an Apple user? That's harsh, man. Stay strong.

It's not just Apple, either - any of the companies involved, whether it's Domino's or Yamaha or whatever, could render this app inoperable for any number of stupid reasons. I'd really like to get some confirmation as to whether or not this app works outside of Japan. I'd do it myself, but I'm no animal; I use Android.

Gmork - 2013-03-07
jesus christ, how old are you evilhomer

EvilHomer - 2013-03-07
Oh no, what did I do now

Gmork - 2013-03-07
you're applehitler! just admit it, you want to put apple users in a furnace!

memedumpster - 2013-03-07
There are support groups for parents of Apple using kids. I think it's called NAME OF SUPPORT GROUP NOT SUPPORTED PLEASE VISIT THE NAME STORE.

Old_Zircon - 2013-03-07
" it's kind of cool that actual Japanese Dominos employees were involved in writing the song for free so Domino's could save the expense of hiring a professional while casting their faceless, multinational corporate brand as 'friend of the common man'"

Old_Zircon - 2013-03-07

EvilHomer - 2013-03-07
I don't know what you're talking about, Gmork. I've never hidden the fact that I'd love to put Apple users in a furnace.

And stars for memedumpster.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-07
>>" it's kind of cool that actual Japanese Dominos employees were involved in writing the song for free so Domino's could save the expense of hiring a professional while casting their faceless, multinational corporate brand as 'friend of the common man'"

The crowdsourcing aspect (fans writing the songs) is the only thing about Hatsune Miku that is truly new or innovative. Otherwise, she might as well be Betty Boop, another singing cartoon.

Gmork - 2013-03-08
just making sure you own up to your dumb opinion

EvilHomer - 2013-03-08
I was with you on the guns, buddy, but I draw the line at Appleogetics.

"Otherwise, she might as well be Betty Boop, another singing cartoon."

Wait, you're not trying to imply that Ms Boop's singing was lame, right? I hope this is meant as a reference to Betty's enduring legacy, like "Hatsune's act has been done before, why just look at the empowering work of that trailblazing pioneer of the 2D rights movement, Betty Boop".

Because Betty Boop was awesome and there's nothing wrong with what she did.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-08
I would NEVER disrespect Betty Boop! What I'm saying is that the ability of the fans to actually get inside her (shut up) is the only thing that makes Hatsune Miku in any way new, other than technology that doesn't really matter. Whether it's animated by a computer or by human artists, a cartoon is a cartoon.

Caminante Nocturno - 2013-03-08
Motherfucking racist.

Gmork - 2013-03-07
This DESERVES one star, but it's so and stupid and pointless that it earns 5 stars of banality-tinged evil.
Sanest Man Alive - 2013-03-07
Well, at least this looks better thought-out than that dumb collab with Toyota...

Oh my god the box dance
Caminante Nocturno - 2013-03-07
Yeah, that whole Toyota thing could have gone better for her. I never thought I'd have to admit to there being a black mark on Miku's career, but at least she isn't sleeping around like her hideous 3D counterparts.

flotsam - 2013-03-07
http://tiny url.com/a3acpml

flotsam - 2013-03-07

Caminante Nocturno - 2013-03-08

flotsam - 2013-03-08
There's nothing wrong with a fictional character enjoying several cocks.

Sudan no1 - 2013-03-08
"at least she isn't sleeping around like her hideous 3D counterparts"

Ahahahahahahaha ..... Oh god you're serious aren't you.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-03-07
In all seriousness, try the Fiery Hawaiian, it's mind blowing!

Tasso - 2013-08-30
"Great vocaloid... songs."
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